Okay. So A New Year Is Dawning

And what would I like to see come of it?

I'd like to be a better daughter of God, a better servant of the King, a better student of the Holy Spirit whom God's given, a better companion to the man I love, a better daughter to my mom and sister to my brother and sister-in-law, and I'd like to be a better friend to the amazing people God's brought into my life. 

I'm not into making resolutions, but I think most of us are hard-pressed not to like the idea of a new year with no mistakes in it, a clean slate, a fresh start.  But you know?  2010 wasn't half bad!  It might've been rough as a 5-day-old corn cob at times, but some amazing things definitely came about before it was all said and done.

Here's a recap.  A year ago this time, my then 82-year-old mama, who lives in South Texas, had been 3 months recovering from open heart surgery, and I was agonizing about whether or not to go back to Southern California and continue with my work on the Reservation or forfeit my life back there and see her through the entirety of the recovery process.  I had taken a 3-month family medical leave of absence from my job and knew if I didn't go back to assume my position there was a very real possibility that my life in Southern Cali was effectively over - not that I wasn't ready for it after 16 years of being homesick for Northwest Arkansas.

I started working a part time job and was there in the Rio Grande Valley in South Texas for a year.  And even though I was there with my mom, I just couldn't seem to find or even create a niche for myself there.  Shortly after starting to work, I met someone online and had a whirldwind courtship that quickly turned into a whirlwind engagement that ultimately blew up into tiny bits from which nothing could be salvaged.  Through that whole experience, I learned a lot myself that I didn't want to know, but it gave me a reference point from which to make a quality decision not to let that define me and not to be any of that when I grow up.  It also helped me decide to hold out for someone who'd bring out the best not the worst, the good things I'd like to build on and grow from.

Then there was a little crack in a doorway that opened to Northwest Arkansas in mid-October.  I burst through that door with a vengeance, and not even 10 days into my initial trip up discovered love that perhaps was there all along.  Perhaps neither of us knew how to recognize it until that one magical day (Oct. 22nd, :).  It was a lot like the day I discovered Jesus.  He'd been there all along, but I couldn't see Him - see who He was and what it could mean for me - until I could.  And once I saw, I could never be the same from that moment forward.  It was a lot like that.  We're still marveling over it 2 months into it and still very much basking in the warm radiance of what was made clear to us on that day I can't forget.  And it was also a lot like when I found Jesus in that there was the initial encounter that scared and rocked me all at the same time, but in the days and weeks that followed there was a bond and a trust being built that has never fully stopped unfolding, but there is something especially sweet and precious about the early days of my walk with Jesus that words are inadequate to express.

Steve can be talking about a grain elevator, and it can undo me because it's not just words I hear when he speaks; it's him.  I hear who he is, and it overwhelms me and fills my heart to capacity with gladness that he's mine and I'm his.

But I had to go and start that, then, didn't I...And now I can't remember what else happened in 2010.  Well, so much for a recap.  Nuff said, I reckon.

I love yaz!  Let's make it a great year, shall we?

Comments

[Morbidscorneroftheuniverse.blogspot.com]

I'm glad to have finally found you! I never am satisfied with FB so it's good to see where you're at and up to these days for sure. You're right about 2010 being an amazing year, many have said it was awful but I can't really complain. No onto 2011 with great expectation! Blessings to you my friend.

[Emartin]

So, why Typepad?

[Jeankfl]

LOL So much for a recap... lost your train of thought?? hehe. I pray this is the one, and the Lord has much for you as a couple to do! When's the engagement and wedding?lol
hugs,
Jean